Coming from Two Different Directions

I’m tired of hearing how I can’t feel as much…. or understand as much… or experience the depth of my psyche and the darkest being of my inner soul — because I don’t use recreational drugs or experiment with extreme activities.

I’m tired of being told that those who “get high” on a daily basis — to reach their “new” normal — live a more enhanced and self-enlightened life than I do.

I’m tired of listening to how my choices in life have prevented me from exploring the total being of my “self” — and how my choices have condemned me to a life that is less than full and whole. 

These lectures end with the conclusion that my choices in life have prevented me from experiencing life with the same god-like clarity and goddess-like purity that these celestial beings are.

Yes, I must admit that my life-choices have put me on a different path than theirs.  I’m not saying that my path is better or worse than theirs… just different.  I’m not judging how they reach their self-actualization, and I would appreciate similar respect.

Yes, I know I must never rest in my quest for self-improvement and spiritual growth.  I know that I must push myself to greater and greater wisdom and effectiveness.  But I also know that I must keep myself balanced and steady — so my feet are grounded and not constantly “tripping” on the stairways to heaven.  That's just the way I have to do it — slow and steady.

 

Yes, I haven’t awaken and explored the ugliness that may be caged within me — a cage that can only be unlocked with the use of hallucinatory and mind-altering drugs.

Yes, I don’t live in an altered reality.  I’m busy dealing with reality.   I deal with the day-to-day mundane routine of life — going to work... getting things done… paying the bills… keeping projects moving… focusing on fulfilling my dreams — and I do this without the use of drugs to get through the day... well, maybe asprin.

Yes, I haven’t developed the same “heightened sense of self” as they have.  I admit that I don’t spend hours and hours digging into my psyche.  I spend that time expanding outward… pursing my mission in life… focusing more on others than on myself.

Plainly said, I am not as “into me” as others are “into themselves”  — nor do I see myself as above all others — a being to be placed on a pedestal and revered.  

No, I see myself on the same level as others…  We are not above or below the other.  We are just different.

This admission shouldn’t make some conclude that I am less — that I feel less, understand less, or experience less, or am “enlightened” less — than they are.

 

We’re simply coming at self-actualization and spirituality from different directions…

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Choices That Keep Us Apart

I ran into an acquaintance the other day.  He spent our time together complaining about just how very busy he’s been…

He's working 7 days a week — 12-to-14 hours a day.  During his time off, he's volunteering at his church — becoming a member of its finance committee.  

Now, he has to post the weekly contributions and generate monthly statements for each contributing member of the church.  He has to go to the monthly meetings and review financials with the members.

On top of that, he has to make quarterly presentations to the assembly — to let everyone know where their tithing is going and to encourage them to give even more.

And, for some reason, he felt obligated to help his third cousin's ex-wife's brother's next-door neighbor with another time-consuming project... so he has to do that.

It would be one thing if he was enjoying what he was doing, but from our conversation, it doesn't seem to be the case — at least, that's what he's telling me…


He complains that all these other obligations are pulling him away from his family and friends.  He has no time for those closest to him, and they are giving him a hard time over it — and there's nothing he can do about it.  Why can't they understand?!
 
As I listened to him, I wondered if he realized that he didn’t have to do all these “things.”  He was actually choosing to do them over other things.

He’s chosen to do all these things, which makes him too busy to spend time with his wife and two boys or visit with his extended family and friends — and he's getting flak from all of them because of it.  

He disagreed.  Obviously, I don't understand the pressures he's under.  He feels so trapped and pressured by everyone around him, and he doesn't like it.  Why can't they just leave him alone?  How did he get to this point?

I felt the depth of his frustration, but his frustration stems from the consequences of his choices.  These consequences are what are feeding his feelings of being trapped and pressured.  

To stop his spiraling anxiety, he would have to be willing to change his decision-making pattern — and make different choices.  When I suggested this, he gave me a list of reasons why he couldn't stop doing what he's doing.  After all, he has to do all these things.  That's what no one seems to get!! 

As I left him, I wished him the best — and was reminded that it's our choices that keep us apart from each other.

 

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